The greatest love jokes around

Harshadewa · 06-12-2008, 01:42 AM

Bad Luck
A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.

As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?"

"What dear?" She asked gently.

"I think you bring me bad luck."

Valentines Slogans
10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk, But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk.

9. Our love will never become cold and hollow, Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow.

8. I bought this Valentine's card at the store, In hopes that, later, you'd be my whore.

7. This feels so good, it feels so right, I just wish it wasn't $250 a night.

6. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class, Especially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass.

5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished, But now I'm fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!!

4. Through all the things that came to pass, Our love has grown. . . but so's your ass.

3. You're a honey. . . and you're a cutie, I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty".

2. I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny, So right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny!

1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister. You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!

Haunted from the grave
An old man and woman were married for years even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation, screams and yelling could be heard deep into the night. A constant statement was heard by the neighbors who feared the man the most.

"When I die I will dig my way up and out of the grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!"

They believed he practiced black magic and was responsible for missing cats and dogs, and strange sounds at all hours. He was feared and enjoyed the respect it garnished.

He died abruptly under strange circumstances and the funeral had a closed casket. After the burial, the wife went straight to the local bar and began to party as if there was no tomorrow.

The gaiety of her actions were becoming extreme while her neighbors approached in a group to ask these questions: Are you not afraid? Concerned? Worried? that this man who practiced black magic and stated when he died he would dig his way up and out of the grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your life?

The wife put down her drink and said, "Let the jerk dig. I had him buried upside down."

Love Story
A Love Story

I shall seek and find you.

I shall take you to bed and control you.

I will make you ache, shake and sweat until you grunt and groan.

I will make you beg for mercy.

I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I leave you.

And you will be weak for days.

All my love,

The Flu

mark1993 · 06-12-2008, 02:00 AM

LOL i admit their funny but not the greatest

Nightwatch · 06-19-2008, 12:55 AM

Son: Dad, I like that girl, and I want to marry her!
Daddy: My son, don't marry that girl because she is your sister, and your Mommy doesn't know it.
Son: Mommy, I want to marry that girl but Daddy said I should not because she is my sister and you don't know!
Mommy: My son, marry that girl because your Daddy is not your father, and he doesn't know...

Jak · 06-19-2008, 03:14 AM

Quote:

7. This feels so good, it feels so right, I just wish it wasn't $250 a night.

That one made me lol.

balachis · 06-30-2008, 10:18 AM

Quote:

9. Our love will never become cold and hollow, Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow.

I love this one..LOL..
Great jokes..
Thanks for sharing..

06-12-2008, 01:42 AM	#1 (permalink)
Harshadewa Junior Member+ Last Online: 10-27-2008 06:44 AM Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 87 Points: 894.00 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 894.00 Donate	The greatest love jokes around Bad Luck A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?" "What dear?" She asked gently. "I think you bring me bad luck." Valentines Slogans 10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk, But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk. 9. Our love will never become cold and hollow, Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow. 8. I bought this Valentine's card at the store, In hopes that, later, you'd be my whore. 7. This feels so good, it feels so right, I just wish it wasn't $250 a night. 6. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class, Especially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass. 5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished, But now I'm fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!! 4. Through all the things that came to pass, Our love has grown. . . but so's your ass. 3. You're a honey. . . and you're a cutie, I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty". 2. I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny, So right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny! 1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister. You should check out the one that I gave to your sister! Haunted from the grave An old man and woman were married for years even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation, screams and yelling could be heard deep into the night. A constant statement was heard by the neighbors who feared the man the most. "When I die I will dig my way up and out of the grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!" They believed he practiced black magic and was responsible for missing cats and dogs, and strange sounds at all hours. He was feared and enjoyed the respect it garnished. He died abruptly under strange circumstances and the funeral had a closed casket. After the burial, the wife went straight to the local bar and began to party as if there was no tomorrow. The gaiety of her actions were becoming extreme while her neighbors approached in a group to ask these questions: Are you not afraid? Concerned? Worried? that this man who practiced black magic and stated when he died he would dig his way up and out of the grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your life? The wife put down her drink and said, "Let the jerk dig. I had him buried upside down." Love Story A Love Story I shall seek and find you. I shall take you to bed and control you. I will make you ache, shake and sweat until you grunt and groan. I will make you beg for mercy. I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I leave you. And you will be weak for days. All my love, The Flu

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06-12-2008, 02:00 AM	#2 (permalink)
mark1993 ForumzPlanet Registered Last Online: 11-14-2008 09:32 PM Join Date: May 2008 Age: 15 Posts: 276 Points: 1,266.95 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 1,266.95 Donate	LOL i admit their funny but not the greatest

06-19-2008, 12:55 AM	#3 (permalink)
Nightwatch Member Last Online: 07-14-2008 11:32 PM Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 183 Points: 386.00 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 386.00 Donate	Son: Dad, I like that girl, and I want to marry her! Daddy: My son, don't marry that girl because she is your sister, and your Mommy doesn't know it. Son: Mommy, I want to marry that girl but Daddy said I should not because she is my sister and you don't know! Mommy: My son, marry that girl because your Daddy is not your father, and he doesn't know...